Teach your kids it’s ok to be selfish.

Hands up if you regularly spend all of your time doing things for other people and leave very little time for yourself? Why is that we’ve all bought into this idea that putting ourselves first is a selfish thing to do?

We place so much emphasis on teaching our children to share and get along, but somewhere along the line we’ve forgotten that we also need to teach them that there are times where you should put yourself first. We want our kids to value working hard but we also want them to know that it’s okay to say no, that it’s okay to do things just because you enjoy them and that sometimes we just need to fill our own cup before anyone else’s.

How do we teach them this?
We do it for ourselves.
Not something that we do very well as Mama’s though, is it?
So in the name of ‘making sure our kids look after themselves well in the future’ lets:
Take time for things we enjoy every day. No exceptions and no guilt.
Put thought and effort into our own meals, as we do with those our children eat. No more leftovers off kids plates, or easy meals that make us feel terrible.
Make time for moving and make it fun.  We put all our energy into signing our little ones up for activities, yet our own ‘play’ gets pushed to the bottom of the pile. No more!  Go sign yourself up to something today.
Put yourself to bed. We create these lovely wind down rituals for our babies and yet take ourselves straight from working on the computer or in front of the television to bed. And then we wonder why our brain is still racing and we can’t sleep?!  Treat yourself to a bedtim routine too – chamomile tea, bath, meditation, restorative yoga, whatever helps you feel calm and sleepy.
Say no to them.  You aren’t being a bad Mama when you sit down and have a cuppa instead of joining in with their play.  Hopefully they’ll remember you taking the time to rest when you needed to, and do the very same thing when they are grown.
So what do you think? ? Are you teaching your little one that it’s ok to be selfish?

2 Responses to “Teach your kids it’s ok to be selfish.

  • I have been more mindful lately about allowing C to wait…if I am busy doing something and he needs or wants me, I tell him I will be with him in a few minutes…more often then not, he figures whatever it was out himself!

    • littleoldsouls@hotmail.com
      10 years ago

      I do the same. It’s great until they start telling you to wait!

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