Stepping out of your comfort zone to grow.
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It’s so easy to think that our comfort zone is where we should stay. To believe that anything that moves us away from the familiar is not the right path for us. Or to tell ourselves that we are just not ‘naturally’ good at something we would like to do, simply because it makes us feel out of our league, uncomfortable and perhaps even a little (or a lot) nervous.
But the reality is, in order to grow and develop, in order to achieve those dreams we have, getting our of the comfort zone is exactly where we need to be.
Getting out of the comfort zone feels risky. We may fear making a fool of ourselves, taking financial risks or wasting our time on something that seems all too hard.
But at some point we need to decide what it is we want more?
Do we want to achieve our goals and put ourselves through these feelings of discomfort or do we want to sit in our comfort zone wondering what might have been, and perhaps always regretting not making the leap?
Today I worked one on one with my yoga teacher as a trial to teach in their new studio. This was WAY out of my comfort zone for a load of reasons. I’ve never taught in this style. It was one on one, so there is certainly nowhere to hide. I really want to teach there and I really respect her; so her opinion is important to me.
I could feel my discomfort and nervousness growing last night as I thought about what I would do and say during the trial. As I indulged in a bit of nervous stressing my mind (or ego) was saying ‘why are you doing this’? ‘It would be much easier to just continue enjoying your time as student again without this stress’.
But there was also a fire in my belly that wanted me to keep going. A part of me that rationalized that passing discomfort was worth the chance to teach in one of the most beautiful yoga spaces I’ve ever been in. That the nervousness or resistance I was feeling to the idea was just the world showing me that this is something I really wanted (because if I didn’t care about it, I would not feel nervous at all).
I had to remind myself that stepping out of the comfort zone is the only way to grow. I can remember being in a regular high school classroom for the first time and feeling so out of my depth. Now I am very comfortable in a room full of teenagers because it has become my comfort zone (of course this does at times change when unexpected things come up but this is mostly true for everything).
Even blogging for the first time was out of my comfort zone. I worried what people would think. Would anyone even read it? Would they think I was an idiot? But with practice, this too has become my comfort zone. Why? Because I have grown my skills, I now have a handle those technical terms that intimidated me 12 months ago and whilst I still have lots to learn, blogging too has become a part of my familiar.
So I went to the trial today and I took a deep breath when I felt the nervousness rising. I reminded myself that when I felt those feelings of discomfort that it was only because I really wanted this and it would all be worth it.
And do you know what?
I received a lot of feedback (or constructive criticism if you prefer). Helpful, specific, encouraging, inspiring, growth inducing feedback.
And that was definitely worth getting out of my comfort zone for.
* In case you are wondering I am pretty pleased to now be working with this studio to develop my teaching further and start teaching in this beautiful space!
You are amazing! What an exciting step forward! You are so right about that desire to sit tight in your comfort zone where it’s safe and indeed, comfortable and easy. I reckon the ego has an absolute field day when we start venturing outside of our normal boundaries and really goes to town on the self sabotage. Having that fire burning though seems to be the best way to keep moving forward. Sounds as if you smashed it! Xx
Congratulations Bettina! Well done, you must be so proud of yourself! 😀
If we all did nothing because of the fear of the unknown, we would all hide in our rooms. That being said I need to get over my fears and start doing instead of thinking about
Congrats!
I think the lovely thing about a comfort zone is that you know it is always there…if you step outside it and you do fail, it rarely changes your status quo significantly…you can go back to feeling comfortable until you are ready to take the next risk.
Congrats to you that is awesome. It is scary but necessary to step out to grow. Good on you
Thanks Deb. Already I am changing the way I teach yoga. And I’m so so excited to get back into teaching. x
Thanks Naomi! It went really well yes. But mainly because this teacher is so supportive and helpful. Very grateful. x
Exactly! The problem of the pelpoe here nowadays is ‘sticking with “comfort zone”‘! Actually, it is not only the problem of the children (including teenagers), but also of nearly everybody. Otherwise, WHY do the pelpoe spend (waste? :-P) so much time, money and effort for all sorts of certs, dips and qualifications? And WHY shall employers ONLY want (or only choose) applicants with ‘RELEVANT qualifications’??? THAT is a MAJOR PROBLEM of this society!!!
Thanks and definitely. But it’s funny how afraid we are of stepping out even when we know it will still be there waiting for us. x
Exactly Julie. That’s my procrastination favourite too. Thinking instead of doing… what are you dreaming of?
Thanks Teagan! xxx
Oh congratulations Bettina! I’m sure you’re an amazing addition to this new space. I think I hold back a fair bit too, I’m actually quite shy even though no one believes me when I say that, it takes a lot of self talk to get me to do a lot of the things I have done. I’m finding that my training in Psychology has come in really handy!
not having to work in retail and getting spoke down to. Of being able to believe in myself, and to start selling instead of giving away my sewing
Sometimes my comfort zone is exactly where I want to be. The times when I realise that a ‘big’ life brings no more happiness than a content one. Every now and then I feel the urge to rage against the zone and then I’m off to prove something to someone, until finding my way back into my nook. It’s happy in there. x
That’s a really interesting perspective and has me thinking… I don’t think being out of your comfort zone and being content are mutually exclusive. But I definitely agree with you that the comfort zone is a lovely place to be. Especially when something you stepped out of your zone for starts to become your familiar. x
Thanks Vanisha. I think we all feel like that but it just depends how good you are at bluffing to hide it. 🙂