How to manage stress when you’re trying to get pregnant

When you explain to some people how stressful trying to conceive is – the first thing they say is… “just relax” or “stop stressing about it and it will just happen”.

I get where they’re coming from but when people said this to me, I felt like screaming at them. “But HOW?! How am I mean to relax when something I want SO BADLY feels like it’s never going to work.” (Yes I know, very yogic, very zen of me).

In hindsight, I can understand that we need to manage stress when you’re trying to get pregnant because it has a negative impact on fertility and also just on how you feel in general.   But I also know that being told to do it by someone who really doesn’t understand what you’re going through is not helpful at all. 

So today I’d like to share some suggestions for how you can reduce stress when you’re trying to conceive. 

How to manage stress when you’re trying to get pregnant

Don’t stress about stressing

When someone tells you to stop stressing, what does it make you do? Stress about how much you’re stressing. Negative cycle here we come. 

Instead, from now on when someone tells you to stop stressing (or any other unhelpful comment in relation to making babies for that matter). I want you to take a deep breath into your belly and as you exhale count down from ten. See if you can extend your breath for the entire count. 

At the end of your breath, I encourage you to say “thanks Sally” and just walk away. Clearly Sally doesn’t understand what you’re going through and you don’t need to waste your energy on her any longer. 

Allow yourself to feel however you need to feel. 

It’s not helpful to deny how you’re feeling. If you’re feeling anxious, allow yourself to feel that, rather than wasting time worrying about feeling anxious. Let yourself feel sad, or angry or even bitter. It’s okay to feel this way. I wrote another post about dealing with these negative feelings, you might like to check that one out. 

Practice mindfulness.

Stress and anxiety are thoughts that are future or past focused. We worry about what might or might not happen in the future. Or we stress about decisions we’ve made in the past. Mindfulness activities help you to bring yourself back to the present moment, where everything actually feels okay.

Yoga and meditation are obvious mindfulness practices (and I’m of course biased here). But it doesn’t even need to be that complicated. You could just stop what you’re doing, notice and name five objects in front of you. This can be enough to bring your attention to the present moment, rather than living in the thoughts or worries that roll around your head. 

Move your body

Daily movement is a great way to reduce stress. It gets your blood and energy flowing and literally flushes stress hormones out of your body. It also helps to release endorphins in the body which make you feel good.

Honestly, choose any type of movement that you enjoy. While now is not the time to take up a new challenging or intense exercise, you also don’t need to be afraid of moving your body. You might like to check out of one of my fertility yoga classes here.

If you’re brand new to fertility yoga – start by downloading my free fertility yoga guide here.

Keep living your happy life

The easiest way to get stressed to the eyeballs when you’re trying to get pregnant, is to make everything in your life focused on falling pregnant. If you’re eating for fertility, moving for fertility, planning your social life around maximising your fertility and avoiding doing things because you might be pregnant, it’s so hard to de-stress from that.

Keep doing all of the things that you enjoy in your life. Keep planning things that make you happy. Don’t put your life on hold and go into waiting for you baby. When this one important thing becomes your everything it makes the journey to getting there feel so much more stressful.

Take a break

If it’s all becoming too much. If you feel like you are so stressed and that you can’t bring yourself down, it might be time to take a break.  It doesn’t have to be forever. Even just taking one month off entirely, can be enough to reset your mindset and help you to come back with a more positive outlook. I’ve written about taking a break before you might like to check that post out here.

These are the ways I found most helpful to manage stress when you’re trying to get pregnant. I’d love to hear your suggestions as well. Leave a comment below. x