Embrace their need to be close



It doesn’t make me proud to admit it, but sometimes the constant contact that babies/ toddlers need makes my skin crawl.  Some days the very last thing I want is someone climbing over me, hanging off my neck, sitting on my lap or the latest charming development; touching the small mole on my neck.  (It’s become like some kind of comforting identifying mark for him and he reaches for it whenever he needs comfort – weird!?)


We had a brief respite from the ‘Mama-only phase’ a few months ago.  For a few amazing weeks Daddy was acceptable for bedtime cuddles and he didn’t need me and only me to take him to the toilet.  But that small taste of freedom didn’t last very long and I could feel my frustration building when he started clinging to me again.


The last few days have been particularly bad as I’ve been really sick with a stomach bug and feeling miserable.  But as much as I was feeling terrible I could see that Eamon was needing even more comfort than usual because he could see I was not ok.  (Which was pretty easy to pick up on, as lying on the bathroom floor trying not to pass out is not typical behaviour for me).


And instead of fighting it (internally I mean) I just resigned myself to the fact that despite wanting to pass out, he needed me to put him to bed, he wanted only me at 3am when he woke, and only my neck with it’s strategically placed mole would do when he needed a cuddle.


I stopped feeling frustrated by his constant need to know where I was and what I was doing and just gave in to it.  And funnily enough, suddenly it didn’t matter so much anymore.  It was like, as soon as I stopped resisting it, it wasn’t such a big deal anymore.  I kinda enjoyed the extra cuddles too, (when I wasn’t dying in the bathroom that is).


Now I’m not ‘cured’ of being frustrated by constant need to be right next to, or on top of, or under me at any given time.  But I know if we can just embrace their need to be close, it might just make the whole thing a little easier.


Do you feel frustrated by the constant contact? Or is it something you love about being a Mama?

2 Responses to “Embrace their need to be close

  • Heather
    9 years ago

    oh I know this all too well, my son is four and he wants me all the time,mommy play cars with me, mommy hold me, mommy carry me. mommy go to the potty with me…..I feel horrible for feeling frustrated sometimes, but I think its totally normal! I love that kids SO SO SO SO much times infinity, but sometimes……I need time off.

    • littleoldsouls@hotmail.com
      9 years ago

      I totally understand that Heather. It’s hard sometimes to explain how conflicting it feels to love them so much yet feel suffocated at the same time.

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