Do these 5 things during the two week wait to stay sane

The two week wait is an incredibly intense, overwhelming time when you’re trying (or rather struggling) to conceive.

I was always a bundle of conflicting emotions.

Hopeful and optimistic. AND anxious and doubtful. 

Negative and certain, then right back to positive and searching for proof of a positive result.

And round and around I would go for 14 or so days. 

It was exhausting. 

Every month I would tell myself to wait until my period was at least a day or two late before I would test. And every month at about 5 days before my period I would be peeing on all the sticks, squinting and desperately hoping to see that second pink line.  

Literally torturing myself because I was too impatient to wait. 

Eventually though I realised that surviving the two week wait in this way was not helping me. After a big break from trying to conceive altogether, I decided I needed to look after myself better during these two weeks if I was going to stay sane. I learnt I needed to be proactive about how I spent my time during these two weeks or else I would spiral into all the emotions and anxiety. 

How to stay sane during the two week wait

Go for long walks outside. 

Walking has to be one of the number one underrated types of exercise. Most likely because it can’t really be sold and therefore no one is raving about it. But honestly, walking (especially if you combine that with being in nature) is so good for releasing anxiety and managing your mood when you’re trying to conceive.  The best part is it’s also fertility friendly, FREE and you can’t really do it wrong.  I recommend my private clients look for trails or walks in their area and plan to do some extended walks during the two week wait. Bonus points if you can convince a friend to come along with you then you get the feel good benefits of social time as well. 

Meditate. 

Look, I know. Meditating when you’re anxious is hard. Your mind is often going a mile a minute and asking it to sit still is like asking a puppy chasing its toy. (Yes, we got a spoodle puppy recently and I’m having trouble coming up with any analogies that aren’t puppy related, #sorrynotsorry).  

Meditating doesn’t have to look like sitting in lotus with your eyes closed though. Meditating can look like washing the dishes and mindfully noticing the suds on your hands, the temperature of the water, the sounds around you. It can also look like swimming laps and consciously counting them. Or it could be sitting in the sunshine with a cup of tea and just being in that moment. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. It is just the act of being in the present moment and practising coming back to the now when you get distracted.

This can help immensely with anxiety during the two week wait because so much of anxiety is being caught up in thoughts about the future (“What if I’m not pregnant? What if I am pregnant?”) And worrying about the past (“What if that glass of wine I drank ruined my chances?” “What if those three days we missed was when I ovulated?”.)  Meditating, or just practising being here and now, helps to remind us that right here, everything is okay. We can breathe a little deeper and rest a little easier knowing that here in this moment everything is as it should be. 

Plan something fun.

When you’re trying to conceive and it isn’t going so well, life gets serious. Suddenly it’s all about timing sex, tracking, eating all the right things, getting enough sleep, doing the right exercise, avoiding toxins etc, etc.  It’s really important to not forget that life is meant to be enjoyed. Remember all those things you used to do just for fun? Now is the time to do them.  This list will be entirely individual. For some of us, fun is a girl’s night out. For others, it will be an afternoon of reading entirely on their own. Maybe it’s sex just for pleasure. Or a few nights away.  Whatever fun means to you, now during the two week wait is the time to schedule it in. Remind yourself that this life you live really is wonderful (and distract yourself from the anxiety in the meantime). 

Learn something new.

I remember when we were trying to conceive our third (and experienced 3 losses), everything became about ttc, possibly being pregnant and planning to be pregnant. While usually I am a person who enjoys personal growth and learning new things; when I was struggling to conceive I put all my focus (and obsessive energy) into trying to conceive.  Honestly, it wasn’t a very healthy way to live.  After taking a well needed break to heal emotionally and mentally, I vowed to not lose my perspective and forget about living my life when we started trying again. Learning something new, whether it be for your career or just personally, can be a really great distraction from the stress of trying to conceive.  Not only that, learning and growing can help when life feels stalled; as it often does when you’re struggling to conceive. 

Amp up the self-care.

The pre-menstrual phase (the time leading into your period) is THE time to amp up the self-care whether you’re trying to conceive or not.  This time of the cycle is often naturally a time where we are more self-critical and negative, especially towards ourselves. Self-care is the antidote to the inner critic.  Again, self-care is very personal. What does it mean to you? Is it a massage? Solo time? Time with friends? Exercise? Self-pleasure? There is no wrong or right here, it just has to feel good for you. 

So these are the five things I recommend you doing during the two week wait to help you stay sane.  How do you keep yourself busy during this time?

Of course, I could have added fertility yoga to this list (but I thought that might be too obvious, given that’s what I’m all about).  If you do want to practise some fertility yoga  with me though you can check out my free fertility yoga guide here. Sending you all the love and hope for your two week wait!