Anger and jealousy when you’re trying to conceive or after losing a baby

trying to conceive

You know that feeling that hits you out of nowhere?


You see the birth or pregnancy announcement on Facebook. You run into an old friend that you didn’t know was expecting.  Someone who has been trying for all of 5 minutes, announces they are finally pregnant.


The hot rush of jealousy rises in your chest.  You feel like screaming ‘it’s not fair’ to no one in particular.


I wanted to share some thoughts today on dealing with jealousy and anger over the announcement of other’s pregnancies or births.  I’ve definitely felt my fair share of this lately. Hey, I may have even triggered this same emotion in you?


If you’re feeling this, I’d love to tell you.


You’re allowed to feel like this.

Don’t feel crazy for thinking or feeling it.

Your feelings aren’t wrong or ‘bitchy’, they are normal feelings of grief.

Don’t try and hold those feelings in or only express them in online forums. Find a real live person who will let you rant and rave for as long as you need.

Try to feel the anger and jealousy fully, and then work at letting it go. Move it out (yoga, running, boxing, screaming – whatever you need). Visualise yourself letting them go. Write it all out – however works best for you.

These feelings are just proof of your love for what you want in your own life. Don’t get caught up in the negative feelings or jealousy and anger – come back to feeling the love and longing for your own baby.

I feel it too.  I’m here beside you. It really sucks to be in this position, but if I am strong enough, you are too.

It does get better my love, with time, little by little, inch by inch.


Here are my thoughts on feeling anger and jealousy when you’re trying to conceive, but I’d love to know how you deal with it too.


How do you deal with the anger and jealousy that comes up when you’re trying to conceive?

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