5 things to say to a pregnant woman instead of ‘Wow you’re huge!’
In the space of ½ an hour the other day I had no less than 5 comments made about my belly, my body and my size. All of which were quite honestly pretty offensive and by the 5th one I was ready with a highly inappropriate come-back for the next person to say something which unfortunately I did not get to use.
I know that most people don’t mean to offend.
I know that they genuinely don’t get that hearing ‘wow you’re huge’ repeatedly is not something that makes one feel particularly confident about the fact that this baby has to come out of you know where.
I know that they think that commenting on the amount of food I am eating is open to judgement just because I’m eating for two, or worse eating for three as I was told today.
But some days… I can’t help but feel just a little bit shit about myself when I’m already feeling uncomfortable in my own body.
Whilst I could add to the angry pregnant lady rant about inappropriate comments that already exists on the net, I thought I’d do something differently instead.
I’m going to assume that, like me, they love a pregnant belly and they really just want to be involved in this time in some small way, and whatever comment they’ve said was just the first thing that came into their foolish minds.
I’m going to assume that they just didn’t know what to say.
So here are my top 5 things to say to a pregnant woman instead of…
Instead of ‘Wow you’re getting huge!?’ try ‘Look at you! You’re glowing. Pregnancy definitely suits you’.
Instead of ‘Wow you’re going to suffer this Summer!’ try ‘What a great season to have a baby!’
Instead of ‘Eating for two?’ say nothing at all! Or try making conversation like a normal person. In case you don’t know ‘How are you?’ and ‘What’s been happening?’ are good opening lines.
Instead of ‘How long have you got to go?’ and ‘Wow still such a long time?!’ try ‘What an exciting time. He/ she will be here before you know it.’
Instead of ‘Wow you’re going to be busy with two!’ say ‘When would you like me to come look after {insert number 1’s name} so that you can do something for yourself?’
Did you have people saying innappropriate things to you whilst you were pregnant?
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I think I could write a book on the many comments that I received throughout my 4 pregnancies. I think the worst one was, ‘are you sure you’re having one?’. In other words, I was as big as a house. The other thing I hated was how many people would come up to me and rub my belly. Strangers. The elderly. There was no escape. I was thinking at one stage of having some t-shirts made up with words such as ‘you can’t touch this’, or ‘Step away from the belly’. I never got around to it…but I was definitely tempted. 🙂
One of the surgeons I work with always said something along the lines of you are looking beautiful…even though I knew beautiful was his code word for huge, it was still SO refreshing to hear!
I don’t mind if people openly admire the bump as long as they do it positively…the other day two ladies came up to me and said they were admiring my bump and wished me luck.
And over the weekend I was going to smack the next person who said, “You are so big…you must be so hot.” You think?